Well it's now Saturday and my Son's 18th birthday is finally here... God does it make me feel old? lol... my youngest child is now an adult and growing up fast..

On a totally different subject though, I tried to talk to my friend last night about what happened to me in London when I was 19yr old.. not an easy task but I did manage some.. it was only when I stopped chatting for a bit that I realised she had fallen asleep.. I had poured out my story for the first time, talked in detail about what he did to me... I actually verbalised what had happened but no one heard me thank god! not sure quite how I feel about it, but knowing that I had done it beleiving her to be listening makes me think that maybe I can do it again when I know she will hear me...

I'd spoken about how he started by blocking my way in the corridor outside my room when I'd gone to answer a phone call, I spoke about how scared I had felt and how releived I was when someone came in and said hello to me, making him move away and let me pass.. I mentioned briefly about him forcing his way into my room and the feelings I'd felt when I knew that I couldn't stop him.. I didn't go into detail about what he had actually done, is to early for that yet and I don't feel ready... but I have made a start eh!

In a way I'm glad that I wasn't heard last night but in another way I'm sad, sad that I had finally plucked up the courage to talk about it all and yet no one heard me! But I don't want my friend feeling bad about falling asleep as it was very late... and I know that when I'm ready to talk again she is there to listen to me.. Still I feel that I have made some progress on my Journey to healing and I will keep on going until I get to the end...